Rum and Reflections

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been at the receiving end of comments about the apparent ‘flaw’ in my character.  I remember for years any school report or feedback would state that I should “be more confident” or “be more assertive”, as if that small piece of advice could transform my whole personality type.  I’ve often been mis-judged as being quiet or shy, my naturally reserved and thoughtful nature interpreted as standoffish. On my graduate scheme I received feedback that I was “aloof” and I was always conscious of coming across as unsociable, not acknowledging the reality that this more reflected the discomfort I felt in my environment rather than a problem with my attitude. I always feel like I need to appear more extroverted, to make people more comfortable with my introversion in social or professional settings, and to make sure they don’t interpret me as still lacking in confidence or self-esteem.   That’s because we live in a world that values extroversion. ...